Monday, July 18, 2011

Assorted Formspring Questions pt. 11

A house.

Is it weird that I have crushes on all of my female cousins? None of them are biologically related, but...

If they aren't biologically related, then how are they your cousins? Are you adopted? I guess it's not really that weird. I've never had a crush on a cousin but I know people who have and it isn't that uncommon.

Would you consider a law that forbids people from marrying or having children with someone of the same race an act of genocide? For the purpose of this question, it's only one race singled out for this ban & it is strictly enforced.

Yes. Absolutely.

Of the percentage of women that call themselves 'pansexual' how many would you say are just trying to make a political statement or make themselves look more attractive to dudes as opposed to actual pansexuals? Yes, I know it's a real thing.

Is that like someone who is into sex with labyrinth-dwelling half-goat men? I'm not sure what political statement that might be making, other than "Goat horns or GTFO!"

Mari Miniatt Do you think I am a horrible person for not being on Formspring for 3 months?

-- MariMiniatt,

No. Do you think I'm a horrible person for throwing live snakes into the open windows of cars I pass on the Interstate?

Bear Garrett Who do you admire?

-- BearGarrett

I admire super-moms. I think you know the kind I mean: they have a full-time job, but still manage to do all the mom stuff and (if they have a husband) wife stuff. They work harder than anyone on the planet and get about four hours of sleep a night, if they are lucky. My mom was like that when Joe and I were younger. I used to work with a lady named Crystal who was one of those, too. I am simply incapable of operating at that level of energy and I admire it.


If you fell to the dark side right now, what would be your first evil deed?


I fell to the darkside a long time ago. My first evil deed was to go on a spree: tossing live snakes into any car with an open window as I passed them on the Interstate. Don't worry: most of them weren't poisonous.

That's what she said.

Is this like Jeopardy Formspring? You give me the answer and I come up with a question? Okay, I can do this.

"Why does it tickle when I pee on the grass?"

Do you think Russian nerds refer to their country as 'The Federation'?

No. They probably use a Russian word.

My head hurts.

85 Do you think the use of autologous cells in medical treatment is not a drug but that it is a medical procedure which would not require FDA intervention but would require medical licensing?


I write books about dragons killing vampires.

Do you feel "closeted" about your views toward religion?

Not really. I don't bring it up a lot because, frankly, most people don't want to talk about it that much. People believe what makes the most sense to them. When it comes to religion, those beliefs make up their entire view of the world. Even if I think they're wrong, I don't feel it's my place to go up to them and say, "Hey, you know all that stuff you know? It's wrong. All of it. So, there."

But just like I don't go around advertising it doesn't mean I hide what I am. I just don't bring it up generally unless asked. I can't say I never let it slip into what I say, because how could I ever share my feelings on something without my core beliefs influencing what I impart? It's impossible.

That being said, I can't deny that knowing people look down on atheists. We're judged to be unethical, hedonistic or bitter. The default position assumed of people in this country is to believe in god. If you don't, then they presume something is wrong with you: a traumatic event, a mental illness, or an immoral just doesn't occur to them that someone might have looked at the same evidence they did and came to a different conclusion. I know there are atheists out there who are the same way: they just can't understand how someone can believe in god. Well, I don't believe in god, but I understand why people do. And I don't feel the need to convince them they are wrong or that I'm right.

I once had a friend desperately try to convince me that there was a god during dinner. Specifically, the Christian god, with his goal being to make me a Christian. I was polite (so was he) and explained why I didn't believe in any god at all, not just his particular god. I'm an equal-opportunity skeptic. Anyway, the conversion attempt was wholly one-sided. I had no interest in turning him into an atheist, or even in convincing him to stop being a Christian. So, I didn't have any emotional attachment to this issue at all. For me, it was two people sitting together discussing what they believed. However, the longer the conversation when on, the more desperate and excitable he became. I finally stopped him and asked why he was getting so upset about this. He said, close to tears, that it was very important to him that he convince me to become a Christian because he thought I was a good person and he didn't want me to go to hell for not believing in god. I replied that he'd just hit on one of the biggest reasons why I'd never be able to convert me: I would never, under any circumstances, believe in (or worship) a god who would send a good person to hell. Or anyone, for that matter--but that's a different discussion. If he had a problem with me going to hell simply for not believing in or worshiping the right mythological creature, then the problem wasn't with my disbelief, the problem was with what he believed.


Do you ever mark a review as 'inappropriate' on Netflix because you thought it was a stupid review?

I've never marked a Netflix review inappropriate for any reason. I barely even read them.

Why would somebody go out of their way to get a phone with a proprietary connection to PC(No standard mini/micro USB)?


Because the little adapter thing costs like 2 bucks. Stop ragging on the iPhone. We get it. You don't like it.

85 No, no no it has nothing to do with the iphone. Blackberry & Samsung do that too. I saw someone that actually didn't want the generic universal usb & that seemed strange. Like they were going out of their way to avoid the universal one. 


Maybe they had a bad experience with the micro-USB connector, the part you plug into the phone. I had one once that got crushed (the little metal part bent after I apparently stepped on it) and it shorted out all the time. Also, it doesn't seem to stay in the phone very well because the weight of the connector is bunched up right behind where it plugs in. When I had a RAZR, it fell out sometimes while I was listening to the headphones. Also, on the RAZR at least, it had only one port. So, I could plug it into an adapter to an 1/8 plug to listen to music in my truck, or plug it into a charger but not both. So on long trips, my phone would die after a couple of hours of listening to music. Same thing with my Samsung. Those phones kind of rectified this by allowing you to swap out the battery, something the iPhone doesn't allow, so you can carry extra charged batteries. But, the extra batteries were stupidly expensive.

What made you decide to make vampirism a virus rather than a bacteria, a misfolded protein (like mad cow), or some other miscellaneous microbe? 


I just call it a virus for lack of a better term. It's actually something completely unique. The vampire strain is a Voidborn infection that mutates human DNA. It's transmittable through bodily fluids, but not all humans are capable of transformation.

What's the name of that ghost that terrified me as a child, & is still pretty scary for some reason?

The Galley Beggar:

If I were at a wedding, would it be inappropriate for me to leave said wedding in the middle of it to play a guitar solo outside?

Depends on the decade.

hey, Claris wanted me to send this to you

Tell Claris I want my double-sided pink fist toy back. She's had it for like a month and I'm getting tired of waiting. I need it back. Fast. Like, urgently. For sex purposes.

If I cloned an ancient Egyptian pharaoh using DNA from a mummy (assume it's possible) & I raised that clone, do you think he'd be mad if I named him Serpentor?

Not at first.

What does a blind man say when hitting on a woman?

Where's my fucking sandwich?

Oh...hitting ON. Sorry...

New York City

Shaun Duke What was the first science fiction/fantasy book that you read? And who bought it for you?


Not counting books read to me as a child (like the Norse mythology I grew up hearing from my mom or the cowboy ghost stories I heard from my father) or kids books and comics, I think it would be A Wrinkle in Time, and my mother bought it for me.

All of my peers are totally insane. Is that a phase, or should I ditch them?

In order for them to be your peers, you'd have to be totally insane as well. Best stick with them. I want to see how this turns out.

It's MORPHIN' TIME! Who is the best Power Ranger ever?


Brown. There was a Brown Ranger, wasn't their?
They'd blow up the Statue of Liberty.

Bear Garrett What would you wish you'd done before you died?

-- BearGarrett

Answered more Formspring questions.

F5 tornadoes.

Do you think Joss Whedon named the Buffy The Vampire Slayer character Xander after Zandar since both the actor playing Xander & the character Zandar from G.I. Joe are twins? And since Tomax or Xamot would have been too obvious.

I doubt it.

85 Are there separate terms for male & female dragons, like the way a female horse is called a mare, & a male horse is called a stallion? 


Female dragons prefer to be called dragoness when referring to them directly, since they consider it a title as well as a race. This is why dragons will, when talking with one another, occasionally refer to each other as "dragon," as in, "Watch what you say, dragon!" or "You're always welcome here, dragoness." But when referring to them just as a species, or as a group, dragon suffices.

85 Could a female dragon withhold part of its genetic memory from its offspring? If it did, would it have to be a blank slate or could she line item omit only certain memories? Could a male dragon do the same when mating with a female dragon? 


No. At least, not without using sorcery to interfere with the reproduction process...which is a major violation of dragon law and a huge taboo for them. Anyway, hatchlings only get a few genetic memories, they don't learn everything the mother knows. In general, they know how to talk and know that they are dragons. They also have some instinctual knowledge, like an appreciation for beauty and a desire to hoard it, and an understanding of what their particular elemental bond is--which determines their breath attack. And they know some general things about their history, like who Tiamat was/is and their general place in the world. The rest they learn from their mother, like how to fly, shape-change, and pretend to be human.

Do you think the idea of vampires (in popular folklore) not being able to be photographed comes from how pale skin reflects light & doesn't show up as well sometimes?

No, I think it's because the sparkles blind the photographer when he tries to use the flash and screws up the shot.

What's your zombie plan?

Mostly just lumber about, moaning and eating people.